Tuesday, I think!

Since I have been dishing about truth check out this truth..."I'm in a tight spot!".  At least that's what I think everytime I attempt to use a public restroom, sit in a  restaurant booth, or try clothes on in a fitting room.  Really who designed those things?  Must have been a  skinny dude!!!  Ok, admit it you all know what I'm talking about.  You realize you are going to have to use a public restroom and immediately you begin feeling the anxiety creep up your neck, "will it be too small?", "will the doors open in or out?", "can I get away with using the handicap stall?".   Ok, you're laughing but you know it's true!  You walk into the restroom at any public place and you look to see if the doors opens in or out.  Most of the time they open in, which means, for big girls anyway, that we are going to have to play contortionist to use the restroom.  Is it  worth the hassle?  Well, for a big girl who's had three babies and now suffers with bladder dementia (it forgets when it is suppose to hold urine and when it is ok to let it go) it is not a matter of "is it worth it?" it's a matter of "can I hold it?".  And the answer is usually NO.  So, I face my anxiety, take a deep breath and bravely confront the restroom stall.  I open the door (of course, inward) step in and begin the humiliating task of attempting to close the door while standing on the toilet seat (ok, I have never really stood on the seat before, but I have straddled it many times).  Once the door is shut, you begin to "prepare" and this is just as bad as the door incident.  I mean imagine if you will, a hippopotamus standing in a shower stall trying to take off undergarments...just not comfortable!!!  So, here I sit in this miniscule stall with one shoulder against each wall, my knees touching the door (and remember I am short), the toilet paper dispenser crowding my belly and I won't even mention where the sanitary napkin disposal is sticking me!  Oh, the horror!!  Unfortunately it doesn't end there because once you are finished you must clean yourself and re-dress.  Not pretty.  I have often hit my head on the door while pulling up my pants!  Once you are successfully re-dressed you have to face opening the door again while straddling the toilet.  Of course, while you are straddling the toilet is the exact time that someone walks by or a little kid points and laughs!  The indignity is nearly unbearable and please do not even get me started on the port a potty!!!  Until next time, keep weighting on me!